How to Write a eulogy,

Introduction
A eulogy is a speech given in remembrance and honor of someone who died. With regard to challenging speaking assignments, the person giving the eulogy may feel that s/he has taken on a difficult task. The audience will certainly be sad, subdued, and somber. The mood will be tense and distracted, and many people are not accustomed to speaking before a group. Think of your time before the audience as an opportunity; the worst is behind the group and now you can help others make sense of it. You can lift them up, give them hope, and provide people with a reason to smile. A home run would be to make them laugh, and since emotions are probably running high, you’re probably closer to achieving this goal than you might think.

When it is time to begin speaking, take your time as you take your place before the group. To assuage your uneasiness, try to make eye contact with members of the audience as you begin. Stand up straight, smile, and exude a quiet sense of confidence. You have been asked to honor someone; it is your honor to do so effectively. Be confident in the importance of your role during this solemn event to the friends and family of the deceased.

Introduce yourself by your full name, and define your relationship to the deceased, unless every person in the room already knows you. The obituary is a good place to start, as you gather details that you may wish to include. You can speak with friends and family of the deceased. Consider the people who will receive you eulogy: what are their sensibilities? What can you say about the deceased to help them recognize and remember the character of their loved one? Consider stories or events that capture the personality and manner of the person you will eulogize. Think about the tone and delivery of your speech – when will you be serious, and when will you invoke humor or enthusiasm?

Organize Your Speech
Draft the eulogy and review it with the people who are likely to have thoughts about the details it should include. You can fax, email or read the draft to people who may have ideas about what should be included. Sharing this duty might also help the people involved; they can work together with you to properly represent the family and the deceased in the eulogy. It’s a good idea to let everyone who might have an interest know that you are working on the eulogy, and to be open to thoughts or input about the contents.

Once your speech is written, practice your delivery. You might work with a friend, or stand before a mirror. If you can manage to speak to an outline of your speech, practice will help you fill in the blanks and deliver your thoughts in a fairly uniform manner. It’s a good idea to avoid making ad hoc comments, or improvising too far away from your plan when you finally deliver your eulogy. You don’t want to surprise or embarrass yourself by saying something you haven’t thought through. If you just cannot find the comfort or confidence to speak to an outline or a list of bullet points, you may wish to consider composing a statement and reading it aloud. If this is the case, it may be best to keep your thoughts short and to the point.

Usually, people who are asked to speak are grieving too; be strong and take comfort in the opportunity to lead others through the difficult celebration of the loved one. People will understand and appreciate your effort, especially when you provide a concise, well-described set of thoughts, ideas and images of the person you are mourning.